Why?

Why do I do this to myself? I wake up almost every single morning wondering my Why questions fo the day. I wake up almost every morning feeling like crap.. literally my body hates me, I don't understand half of the things in my life or what's going on or why I do half of the things I do.. to myself and others.
Some days just really don't make sense to me. My head is constantly in a fog that it won't come out of. I have to force myself to be motivated, even though I honestly couldn't care less about a LOT of things. I try to be motivated, but most of the time it doesn't work. I go to work, get my work done, most of the time not caring very much, come home, go to sleep and repeat. I'm in 2 classes that don't matter and really, who gives a crap about history classes? Not me, I don't learn anything from them. I try to remind myself that it's getting me toward my ultimate goal...getting a BSN. But again, why am I doing that? I don't seem to care, or can't find the energy to care about even doing that, even though I KNOW it will better my life.
I just don't care right now... And I can't seem to shake the feeling off. I WANT to care and be motivated, but it's not working.
In the end...It doesn't even matter.






/end depressing post.